1. Stay true to yourself.

So much unhappiness stems from making decisions that go against what you know in your core, your gut, to be right. Deep down, you don't want to do it--but you do it anyway. You listen to your head. You try to convince yourself the raise is worth it, or the risk is too great, or it's better to just stay put, to keep your head down. Staying true to yourself is a challenge, yes. But effectively suppressing your true self is even more challenging.

2. Pay attention.

Oh the things we’d know if we would only listen. Pay attention when someone introduces themselves to you. Do whatever you need to in order to remember their name. Listen when they tell you about their weekend plans. Listen when they talk about their mother, “the best cook in the world.” Never brush something off as a “a little thing.” It’s the little things that matter. Think about how pleasantly surprised you felt when one of your friends referred back to a minor detail that you mentioned in passing a long time ago. “Wait…you remembered that?” The little things are what makes a person feel special.

3. Give a shit.

 Stop feeding this new trend of “it’s cool to be jaded so I’m going to act like I don’t give an eff about anything.” You know what’s cool? Being passionate about the things that you enjoy. Pursuing music if you’re into it, whether it’s on stage or behind the scenes. Chasing your dreams, no matter how massive or wild they may be. Trying to find a way to fix a problem in your local community because you and everyone living there deserves better. Wanting to help your friends, even if you don’t gain anything more from it than the pleasure of seeing them well. GIVE A FUCK.

4. Choose your friends wisely.

You are a reflection of the five people you spend the most time with--choose them wisely. If they complain a lot, you will inevitably complain a lot. If they are lazy, you will become lazy. If they are not actively improving themselves, you will not actively improve yourself--unless you leave the situation and find others who will reflect that part of you.
It is very difficult to remain in a state of happiness when you are surrounded by negativity.

5. Develop positive habits.

We as humans like to believe "happiness" is the destination wherein there is no more challenge. Everything is easy. In fact, it is quite the opposite. We love challenge. We thrive off challenge. We grow through challenge. We discover ourselves by being challenged. And it is not the thing itself, but your emotional state that decides whether or not that process of growing and being challenged is enjoyable, in the same way a workout can be enjoyable or grueling and painful (in the same way a workout to someone out of shape can be painful).
The simple act of developing positive habits in itself brings a deeply "earned" happiness. We are happy because we have overcome ourselves.

6. Create certainty and leave room for uncertainty.

If everything in your life is planned out, then it's boring. If nothing in your life is planned out, then it's risky and uneasy. Happiness is found somewhere in the middle. You want just enough certainty in your life to feel like you have ground to stand on, you're not completely in danger, but you've left the window open for spontaneity to sneak in for a sleepover every now and then.
It's the spontaneous adventures that bring extreme moments of joy. But they are best enjoyed when you know you have something safe to land on as well.

7. Be vulnerable.

Frightening, but there is an unrivaled happiness that comes through acts of vulnerability. These moments confirm we are human. That we are imperfect. We open ourselves and, as if looking in the mirror for the first time, are able to step back and see who we are a bit more clearly--for better or worse. We accept ourselves, and let others do the same.
Vulnerability is the secret. We as a society go to great lengths to hide who we are, and create masks, personas, and images to portray the parts we know will receive approval--while banishing the rest to the shadows. But all our best work comes from being vulnerable. All our happiest moments and saddest realizations come from being vulnerable. All our deepest loves and greatest friendships come from being vulnerable. All our art, all our music, all our creativity comes from being vulnerable.
Vulnerability is the secret to happiness--and that is why I started this article with the breath. Happiness is not out there somewhere, waiting for you. Happiness is hidden within vulnerability, and vulnerability is hidden within you.